Spot the Idiot 3
They let me do letters to the editor page today. They shouldn't do that.
Step back, please. Step back! Do not cross the police line! Do not attempt to approach this sentence. Wounded prose is very dangerous.
Remain calm. A team of academics from Tufts is due to arrive any minute by helicopter, and it will attempt to extract the subject and the predicate. Sadly, the chance of survival of either is less than 50 percent.
Translation: Every time George W. Bush appears, I literally tune him out. Nonetheless, I know everything about what he thinks, says, and does, and I'm going to waste your time telling you about it, in my lugubrious way.
TRANSL: Why isn't the rest of America as smart as me? Why doesn't the press ask America why it isn't as smart as me? I write to newspapers all the time and they never publish me. Maybe it's because I write like Barbara Cartland on crack? No, no, it must be the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy crushing my dissent.
Unfortunately, I didn't have room in my layout to get that one in.
If it isn’t a bad dream (I’ve pinched myself long, long since black and blue) and it isn’t a bad joke (potted plant picked prom king...), why, why does America wish for President one clearly to my and many more eyes and years - including I should think those of no few if not most of his supporters - inferior to the role? [re Toles cartoon, 2-11]
Step back, please. Step back! Do not cross the police line! Do not attempt to approach this sentence. Wounded prose is very dangerous.
Remain calm. A team of academics from Tufts is due to arrive any minute by helicopter, and it will attempt to extract the subject and the predicate. Sadly, the chance of survival of either is less than 50 percent.
A most mystifying not to say disillusioning and depressing phenomenon: I can’t change channels fast enough at his face or voice, avoiding as I do reminder this is America’s idea of a leader - freely chosen by the planet’s preeminent democracy the sort of thing once upon a time people were stuck with under a hereditary monarchy. An abysmal business one must, shudderingly, sighfully, abide four more years.
Translation: Every time George W. Bush appears, I literally tune him out. Nonetheless, I know everything about what he thinks, says, and does, and I'm going to waste your time telling you about it, in my lugubrious way.
I’ve yet to encounter in periodical anything save snidely, glancingly addressing this question; one I can’t believe journalists deem insignificant. I’ve never heard surmised, of investigation, much less actually why, with all of the capable men and women available (including certainly within the Republican Party), seemingly intelligent, educated people line up for this boy, virtual boy - uncouth, inarticulate, know-nothing - in preference. The shoulder-shaking chuckle, is that irresistibly it, why? (I must say I also wonder why this sort of questioning of mine is, I daresay, suppressed: I’ve several times the past four years written periodicals, as here, in this vein, all vainly, not word one run.)
TRANSL: Why isn't the rest of America as smart as me? Why doesn't the press ask America why it isn't as smart as me? I write to newspapers all the time and they never publish me. Maybe it's because I write like Barbara Cartland on crack? No, no, it must be the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy crushing my dissent.
As I currently lack the heart to follow politics (it no longer seems adult fare; will not sit for the taking, treating seriously (save symptomatically) such a (hem) President), the sole thing I look for from the present occupant of the Oval Office is a reinvigoration of education in this country, that his like shant happen again.
Unfortunately, I didn't have room in my layout to get that one in.
